Not Writing Causes Facial Hair!

Viewers of David Letterman and Conan O'Brien (and sort of Craig Ferguson) confirm that 8 weeks without writers has caused excess facial hair to grow on the well-known mugs of late-night TV hosts.

Finally, I understand why there are no late-night female hosts. It's just too dangerous.

I can't wait for The Daily Show and the Colbert Report to return, writers or no.

I'm lying. Without writers, who cares?

I just wanted an excuse to show off my expertise with a basic paint program.

How much more writing of all kinds: novels, book proposals, bio's, poetry, flash fiction, etc., is being done now that television has no newly-written shows to entice us from our desks?

And wouldn't it be nice if not just screenwriters, but all writers, started getting decent pay and contracts? Treated like contributors instead of pests? Maybe even had their emails answered?

Pass the other tequila bottle, por favor. I themptied vis one.